Chinese Proverbs

The participant's perspectives are clouded while the bystander's views are clear.

Your neighbor's wife looks prettier than your own.

When the tiger comes down from the mountain to the plains, it is bullied by the dogs.

Once bitten by a snake, you are even frightened by a rope that resembles a snake.

Pick the flower when it is ready to be picked.

Sex Tips - How To Tell If She's Faking Her Orgasm

Male Insecurity and Jealousy

So, you finally got the girl of your dreams. She's fine-looking and sexy. She's definitely a catch! Every time you go out, other guys are checking her out. So, you hold her closer, have a protective arm around her, and cast steely "Don't you mess with my girlfriend" stares at the other guys. You closely watch her every move and feel a pang of jealousy and insecurity, even at times when it is not the least bit warranted. You constantly call her up to check up on her or count the seconds before she answers your call. You've been too paranoid too many times whenever she says she's out with her girl friends or co-workers, or if she's meeting up with a high school sweetheart or an ex-flame. You instantly erupt in jealous rage at the mention of past loves.

You feel trapped by your insecurity and direct your energy to over protectiveness and jealousy instead. So, you try to buy her time and attention by overwhelming her with the prettiest flowers, wonderful gifts, expensive dinners, and luxurious holidays. You want to control and have the upper hand in the relationship. You utilize the possess-and-isolate tactic on her. You always make excuses for her to be always with you, or to be available at your beck and call. Her girl friends are exasperated with you and upset at how possessive you are.

So where does all this insecurity and jealousy spring from? You may have bad experiences before regarding relationships and loyalty, and you ensure that it doesn't ever happen again. In turn, you intensely guarantee that you are the sole object of her desire.

Male insecurity has also been known to directly correlate with a deficiency in the size of the male member. Many men are bothered that they are not big enough or they're not gonna please their ladies with their current size. This probably explains the thriving and often lucrative business that is penis enlargement.

Another reason may be about money or resources. Many guys feel disdain, oftentimes envy, towards other men who are better off than themselves. With more money, you could probably spend lavish gifts for your girl; and with more presents, you think you make yourself highly desirable and attractive.

Men, just like women, also need to be liked. They want to be respected, adored, and esteemed. They want to be feel important and special to someone. They want to be loved and needed.

So, how would you rein in your insecurity and keep your jealousy in check? Take time to do a self-assessment. Improve your looks and learn new things. Go to the gym, join sports club, or enroll in short courses like foreign languages, arts, or even acting. More importantly, is the measure of trust and loyalty that you and your girl have for each other. Don't let your insecurities cloud your judgment and ruin your relationships. Treat her with respect as much as you would want her to do the same for you.

Dallas Cowboys Tribute

Movie Quotes

Dumb and Dumber
Harry: Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.

Hope Floats
Birdee: Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it's what's in the middle that counts. So, when you find yourself at the beginning, just give hope a chance to float up. And it will.

Clue
Mrs. White: Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable

Online Poker

Erogenous zones on the female body

Since the body of a woman is one of the most delightful things in a man's life, it is only natural that men should want to be more curious about what spots must be touched to drive a woman wild with desire. The erogenous zones are areas of the female and male bodies that have heightened sensitivity. Stimulation of these areas usually results in sexual response, although not every individual responds in the same way to the stimulation of all erogenous zones.

Some of the erogenous zones of the female body, such as the nape of the neck and the inner thighs, are well known from the popular literature. Others, such as the feet and the buttocks, are seen as belonging rather to the fetish group by certain people. However, we shall review them all here.

The feet: The feet are a good place to start hen learning about the power of touch over a woman's sensitive areas. Many women like to have their toes tickled, licked and sucked on lightly. Yes, this does sound like a brave thing to do for many men, but many guys actually enjoy it. Moving up we find the back of the knees, which is an area featuring a high number of nerve endings. This means that the skin is very sensitive to touches and kisses. Further up still are the inner thighs, one of the most popular erogenous areas. Kiss them lightly, bite them lightly and caress to your (and hers) heart's content. Women will love it. At the top backside of the feet are the buttocks, another sensitive area and most women like to have it caressed. If you want to make her sizzling hot, you can also try kissing and licking and I'm sure most guys would not mind if it led to a little anal sex.

The nape of her neck and the ears. These two are a powerful combination and are usually the place to start the foreplay. Kissing, licking, caressing and massage work wonders on the most sensual part of her neck, while gently nibbling her ears will maker her hot and show you are a sophisticated lover at the same time.

The big three. And finally we come to the big three erogenous zones everybody knows about (which reminds me about that story of a German couple who did not have kids because they had no idea they were supposed to have sex, nor any idea what sex was). The big three are the lips, the breasts and the vagina/clitoris area. Kisses, caresses, licking, touching and fondling are not only highly recommended, but actually a must for any man who wants to experience the good things in life. And keep in mind that it pays to learn about both what makes your lady go over the edge with pleasure and the way to get her there.

Fat Loss Made Possible

Generally people confuse weight loss with fat loss from the body. This is a serious misunderstanding. Well-being of a person depends on a certain amount of fat in the body. Fat is emergency storage of energy in your body. Indiscriminate fat loss from the body can be dangerous.

Clinically men are considered obese if their body fat level is over 25% and women are considered obese if their body fat level is over 30%; by this reckoning about 60% of population can be categorized as being obese.

A program for fat loss basically has two components; first, cutting down consumption of excess calories which cause a build up of fat in the body and secondly gradually burning off the excess fat the body has acquired in the past. Cutting down on intake of excess calories is a matter of observing healthy diet in a disciplined manner; burning off excess fat from the body is generally done by suitable exercises and it can be supplemented by some dietary practices. Some fat burner preparations are available on the market, but it is advisable to avoid them as far as possible.

Any program for fat loss must incorporate appropriate routine of exercises. Exercising you will undertake is not for building a six-pack body but to help burn the stored fat and at the same time maintain your health. Aerobic exercises and jogging are the barest minimum that you must include in your routines. Exercises increase the rate of metabolism which helps burn off the fat; muscles burn more calories than fat.

Healthy dietary practice would require consumption of appropriate amount of “good” proteins, “good” carbohydrates, and “good” fats. I have used the word “good” deliberately, to be able to clear certain notions people have regarding desirability of certain components of diet.

As I mentioned earlier, exercises are essential for general well-being and also for burning calories. Protein is essential in building muscles. Low fat milk products such as skimmed milk, cottage cheese, yogurt as well as fish are rich in proteins but are low on fat. So they are good proteins.

Similarly carbohydrates are essential for the body as source of energy. Beans, fruits, vegetables, and whole grains not only supply carbohydrates to the body but they are natural hunger-suppressants because body can consume them slowly. They are also moderate on calories and fats.

Contrary to popular belief certain fatty foods are very helpful to the body. Fatty acids the body can get from eating fish such as Salmon, Mackerel, Sardines and Herrings help regulate blood pressure, they can lower risk of heart failures, and they prevent blood clotting.

Fiber foods hardly contribute any calories, and they are filling. They are natural hunger suppressants. Moreover they are not digested by the body and while passing through the body undigested they help in carrying away some fats and proteins. Apples, beans, broccoli, brown rice, nuts and bran are good fiber foods. Eat adequate fiber food.

While trying to lose fat from the body, drink plenty of water - especially ice cold water. Water is a natural appetite suppressant and it is essential in the process of burning up the stored fat. It helps natural weight loss.

You will see it is possible to achieve fat loss if realistic practical steps are taken.

Stand Tall

Have a penis to be proud of!

Dallas Cowboys Tribute- The Boys Are Back In Town

Funny Quotes

Oscar Levant
What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.

Homer Simpson
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

Jean Kerr
I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want - an adorable pancreas?

Guy masturbating in the bathroom stall at my work

Ok, I get it. You had to rub one out. I know the feeling. Maybe it was thinking about that totally hot little minx in purchasing that got you going. Or you got some steamy email from your wife. Whatever it was, you just needed a little release. We've all been there my friend.

But if I may be so bold as to offer a few tips?

1. Location Location Location - Maybe it was the bathroom closest to your desk. Maybe it has bigger stalls for more elbow room. But whatever the reason, the bathroom just off the factory floor is not your best choice. It is huge for a reason. There are about 80-90 workers on that factory floor at all times, plus about 30-40 office workers, and there's almost always at least one person who needs to take a squirt.

2. Silence is Golden - While we all might empathize with your situation, NO ONE WANTS YOU HEAR YOU SLAP YOUR SALAMI!! And we certainly don't want to hear the gentle grunts you were letting out. It was like being forced to listen to the audio of a bad gay porn soundtrack, minus the cheesy Casio keyboard jazz/funk fusion music. Keep it down, will ya?

3. Ms Manners says... - Ok, so you had a poor choice in bathrooms and you are just naturally loud. Even elemental problems such as these can be overcome by following rule #3. When someone comes into the bathroom....STOP!!! Seriously, I'd think that would be the easiest rule to follow. Did you not hear me open the door? Did you not hear me pull the ass gasket from the holder, tear off those 3 annoying pieces that hold the center in place, and sit down? Good god man, another man is taking a shit not 8 feet away from you. Shouldn't that take the bloom off the rose, so to speak?

4. Good fences make good neighbors - This is the most important rule of all. If you have been caught rubbing one out in the men's room, do not, under any circumstances, come out of your stall until all affected parties have left the bathroom. I'm never going to be able to get the picture out of my head of you going over to the sink right next to the one I was at, and looking at me in your mirror with a big contented smile while you're washing your hands.

They don't make a body soap strong enough for the ick I felt after that. No amount of showering tonight will do it I'm afraid.

The Shawshank Redemption: Hope

Inspirational Quotes

Mark Twain
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

Zig Ziglar
People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.

T. S. Elliot
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.

Nora Roberts
If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place.

To the girl who flashed me while I was driving

You were on the sidewalk with a gaggle of your friends and you were all rushing toward the curb. I hit my brakes, afraid that you were going to run into the street, but you flashed me instead.

Never before have I believed in love at first sight. They were shapely and round and oh-so-generously proportioned, with smooth creamy skin, and they were proudly standing up with the resilience of youth. I immediately began thinking of all the things I could do with your breasts -- we could go for long walks together on misty mornings, have dinner in romantic restaurants, go for bike rides around the lake. I began to imagine a lifetime of waking up with your breasts in my face, continuing to love them as age and gravity inevitably take their toll.

I could write poems for your pom-poms, ditties for your titties. Eat your heart out Keats -- who needs a Grecian urn when I've got a pair of ice cream sundaes with cherries on top?

I'm almost certainly too old for you, but I think I could still have a meaningful relationship with your boobs.

dallas cowboys (through the years)

My anniversary

This may very well explain it all!

The Pill may put you off smell of your man and ruin your relationship

A study by British scientists suggests that taking the Pill can change a woman’s taste in men — to those who are genetically less compatible.

The research found that the Pill can alter the type of male scent that women find most attractive, which may in turn affect the kind of men they choose as partners.

Full Story

"What Happened to All the Nice Guys?"

What happened to all the nice guys?

The answer is simple: you did.

See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were fucking treated you.

At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.

Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"

Well, once again, you did.

You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an asshole than he ever wanted to be.

Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.

So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:

1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.

I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.

If you were five years younger.

So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've fucked yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bullshit and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't fucking want you, now.

Sincerely,

A Recovering Nice Guy

Improve your sex life

It's What HAPPENS In That Six Minutes.......

Boobs To Die For

Books for Insecure Women

I've got a ton of books my ex-wife left behind when she had to move out. They scream co-dependency, negative body image, self-loathing, and above all, the mindless need to buy what everyone else is buying. If you have a pathetically lost woman in your life, and you want to show her how much you care by giving her some used self-help books, then you've come to the right place. Just a sample of the great titles available FREE OF CHARGE:

"Make the Connection" by Bob Greene and Oprah Winfrey. Oprah. That special woman in your life can't complain if you bring her this book. It is against the rules to say anything that, in any way, could be construed as negative about Oprah.

"The Zone" Some crappy diet book.

"Total Health Makeover" by Marilu Henner. If the original weren't enough, I've got the 30 day version too. I kid you not. She did hang in there on the Celebrity Apprentice for a while... maybe these should go on Ebay... act now before I change my mind!

"Love is a Choice" by some psychobabbler or other. I'm too lazy to get up from my chair and I can't read the author from here. I think there's another one up there called "Co-dependent No More". The sad thing is my ex had these books BEFORE we got married... did I heed the giant waving red flags? No, I did not.

A bunch of other crappy novels. You know, the kind that are so bad that you can't hardly stand to look at the cover. Now I'm not talking trashy romance novels here. I'm talking about the kind of crap with some cheesy rose on the front that you just know is about some family where the mom gets cancer or something, and there's tons of suffering, and no one gets laid.

Dallas Cowboys 2008 Schedule

More Love Quotes

Mark Twain
Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

Mother Teresa
If you judge people, you have no time to love them.

Helen Keller
The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.

Roy Croft
I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.

Stupid People Doing Stupid Things

I Got Fired Today

I walked into work this morning at about 8:53 this morning and was surprisingly greeted by my V.P.


I thought to myself, "That's odd... I didn't even know he knew I still work here?" He asked me if I knew what time it was because I am normally scheduled to be there at 8am Monday-Friday. I replied, "No, a lion attacked me on the way into work this morning. Lost my watch in the struggle. Enough about me, how can I be of assistance to you today, Mr. (****)?"


Needless to say, he didn't find my explanation very endearing :-/


Next thing I knew, I get pulled into the conference room. Thought to myself, "Geesh, I wonder what this is about?" Walked into the room and saw my direct boss and all his lovely cohorts. They presented me my last four annual reviews and wished to go over them in detail. Naturally, I started laughing because of things I wrote in the past. Didn't know they actually read them? My boss revisted one of them that I wrote in 2007 where I am supposed to comment in the section of "Employee's Greatest Accomplishments". He read it off, "I got the Supervisor/Manager in the deli [downstairs] to start carrying V8 juice."


I laughed and told them to cut to the chase. Whadya know? They had termination papers for me to sign. "Sure." A couple handshakes and then asked for a small box to pack my belongings. They obliged.


Got back to my cubicle w/one of those white Office Max "On-the-Go" file boxes and packed five years worth of stuff. For the last time, I sat in my squeaky chair that never fit me right in all the years I'd been there. Only reason I kept it was because I knew the sound annoyed the shit out of my cubemate. In fact, one day he tried to mace it with WD-40. I lied and told him that I am severly allergic to it. He pouted for me to get a new chair and mumbled a couple swear words. I giggled so hard inside my head to a point that my face turned red. I just blamed the redness on the sight of the WD-40 can.


Anyhow, back to my packing... found a lot of nothing. It hit me that I never really did "set up shop" like everyone else there at work had. You go into some cubes where the ladies have fuzzy arm sleeves for their chairs, hand-knitted blankets for their lap, a plethora of family/friends photos, personal lamps, small fish bowls, and enough plants sitting around to open up a plant nursery. Me? Well, I found the belongings that I had accumulated over five years:

*Microwave pop-corn (take your pick, I have 4 flavors ranging from "Movie Theatre Butter" to Kettle!)
*43 packets of Taco Bell's Mild sauce
*12 packets of Morton's Salt
*5 packets of pepper
*3 packets of mustard
*1 can of Campell's Chunky Beef Barley
*3 Cup of Noodles (beef flavor)
*2 Top Ramen Packs (beef flavor again)
*a box of Quaker Oatmeal "Weight Control" (yeah, no interest... lady a work gave it to me 2 yrs ago)
*4 boxes of Girl Scout cookies that I bought months ago (Thin Mint, Samoas, Peanut Butter Patties)
*1 white bowl and tons of plasticware
*and finally, travel and financial magazines dating back to 2006.


Yep, that's it folks! No pictures, no plants, no fish. Oh, wait... I have one last item I found that hit a soft spot... it's Christmas ornament that was given to me by a co-worker last year. He gives them out every year and they're kinda cute considering he's a big Samoan dude w/a tribe of pooh-pooh makers at home. They make them out of clothes pins.


Moral of my story: Don't eat too much red meat and salty foods - leads to kidney stones.

PS: Let me know if you're hiring :-)

Vision Quest (1985) - Before You Know it

Wild Girls Party

Love Quotes

Anonymous
Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.

Jean Anouilh
There is love of course. And then there's life, its enemy.

G. K. Chesterton
The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.

Socrates
The hottest love has the coldest end.

Top 10 Greatest Movie Endings of All Time!

Beach Babes