Hot girls dancing

Masturbating at work?

Ok, I get it. You had to rub one out. I know the feeling. Maybe it was thinking about that totally hot little minx in purchasing that got you going. Or you got some steamy email from your wife. Whatever it was, you just needed a little release. We've all been there my friend.

But if I may be so bold as to offer a few tips?

1. Location Location Location - Maybe it was the bathroom closest to your desk. Maybe it has bigger stalls for more elbow room. But whatever the reason, the bathroom just off the factory floor is not your best choice. It is huge for a reason. There are about 80-90 workers on that factory floor at all times, plus about 30-40 office workers, and there's almost always at least one person who needs to take a squirt.

2. Silence is Golden - While we all might empathize with your situation, NO ONE WANTS YOU HEAR YOU SLAP YOUR SALAMI!! And we certainly don't want to hear the gentle grunts you were letting out. It was like being forced to listen to the audio of a bad gay porn soundtrack, minus the cheesy Casio keyboard jazz/funk fusion music. Keep it down, will ya?

3. Ms Manners says... - Ok, so you had a poor choice in bathrooms and you are just naturally loud. Even elemental problems such as these can be overcome by following rule #3. When someone comes into the bathroom....STOP!!! Seriously, I'd think that would be the easiest rule to follow. Did you not hear me open the door? Did you not hear me pull the ass gasket from the holder, tear off those 3 annoying pieces that hold the center in place, and sit down? Good god man, another man is taking a shit not 8 feet away from you. Shouldn't that take the bloom off the rose, so to speak?

4. Good fences make good neighbors - This is the most important rule of all. If you have been caught rubbing one out in the men's room, do not, under any circumstances, come out of your stall until all affected parties have left the bathroom. I'm never going to be able to get the picture out of my head of you going over to the sink right next to the one I was at, and looking at me in your mirror with a big contented smile while you're washing your hands.

They don't make a body soap strong enough for the ick I felt after that. No amount of showering tonight will do it I'm afraid.

Girls Getting Their Bush Wax-ed

I would like to express my appreciation for the pain you all go through for the benefit of all mankind.

Simpsons!

Bart Simpson: This is the worst day of my life!
Homer Simpson: Worst day of your life, so far.

IMDB Simpsons Movie

Who not to marry...

Never marry a woman whose father took off or was abusive to her mother UNLESS she got the right lesson from it ... the right lesson being that responsible men are to be adored and valued and their eccentricities and (mild, occasional) irresponsibilities tolerated. You need to have clear evidence that she took the right lesson -- if not, you're going to have a nightmare marriage dominated by her suspicion, paranoia, and total inability to please.

Benjamin Franklin

A slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.

Anger is never without Reason, but seldom with a good One.

The big 3 ~ Can you pick your song?

Duran Duran ~ Ordinary World


Skid Row ~ I Remember You


Linkin Park ~ In The End

History Of Polygamy

Marriage has essentially been viewed as a social phenomenon. As such, it is not necessary for the more basic act of procreation to take place. Because of this fact, discussions regarding marriage have always centered on the legal, cultural and religious significance of the ceremony itself and all that it entails. The types of marriages, like monogamous and polygamous marriages, exist only to fulfill certain social or religious obligations imposed upon a person by forces other than natural.

Christianity is the biggest opponent of polygamy in today's society. It may be noted, however, that the bible itself, which forms the basis for Christian faith, described some patriarchs as having polygamous marriages, like Moses (Numbers 12:1) and Abraham (Genesis 16:1, Genesis 16:3 and Genesis 25:1). These early cases of polygamy were explained by Saint Augustine in The Good of Marriage as having been rooted in the ancient times' necessity to procreate. Therefore, at present, since that necessity no longer exists, the Catholic Church has declared polygamy as unlawful. While some Protestant faiths, during the period of "Protestant Reformation," temporarily sanctioned the practice of polygamy on the basis of some of the biblical provisions, others publicly denounced it. Consequently, protestant Christians later on decided to abandon polygamy altogether.

Today, polygamy, or plural marriages, is a practice upon which, a substantial part of the world has expressed its formal scorn. It is now widely accepted by most political and legal systems that polygamy fails to meet the common moral and legal standards necessary to maintain world and societal order. This new ideal is probably the result of two major factors, namely, the spread of Christianity and the more pragmatic considerations of multiple divorces and property settlement of spouses. The latter factor merely concerns the inconveniences and conflicts attendant to having several wives or husbands, each vying for a piece of property upon the common spouse's death or divorce. Likewise repulsive is the instability that may result in the matters of the wives' and children's status in society. It is, after all, a generally accepted principle that a person's status should not be subjected to needless uncertainty. The spread of Christianity or religious evolution in general, is a much more complex factor that may have affected the world view on polygamy.

New phone number

I have a new phone number. If you don't have it, I probably don't want you to have it :) If you feel you have been overlooked, send me an email.

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. ~ Herm Albright (1876 - 1944)

Miss you Dad

I've always followed my father's advice: he told me, first to always keep my word and, second, to never insult anybody unintentionally. If I insult you, you can be goddamn sure I intend to. And, third, he told me not to go around looking for trouble. ~ John Wayne (1907 - 1979)

My Father taught me how to be a man – and not by instilling in me a sense of machismo or an agenda of dominance. He taught me that a real man doesn’t take, he gives; he doesn’t use force, he uses logic; doesn’t play the role of trouble-maker, but rather, trouble-shooter; and most importantly, a real man is defined by what’s in his heart, not his pants. ~ Kevin Smith, My Boring Ass Life

Megan Fox of Transformers

Spread it

Megan Fox has admitted to trying “several” drugs before choosing her favorite.

Megan told Maxim magazine: “I’ve done drugs, and that’s how I know I don’t like them.

“I tried several things in order to make an informed decision, but I didn’t enjoy anything other than marijuana.”

She also thinks that marijuana should be legalize.

She said: “I don’t even think of marijuana as a drug - it should be legalized.”

The 21-year-old actress-and-model claims the majority of Hollywood stars are regular cocaine users.

She revealed: “Cocaine is back with a vengeance… Celebrities aren’t trying to hide it, except when people have camera phones.

“I know about five people who aren’t on drugs today, and I’m one of them.”

The check is in the mail!

Jack Burton: When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, looks you crooked in the eye and asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have ya paid your dues, Jack?" "Yessir, the check is in the mail."

Why marriage no longer makes sense

Traditional marriage balances different privileges and obligations for men and women. Modern woman wants all the benefits of "equality" without any of the responsibilities.
Traditional Western culture balanced special privileges for women with special obligations, and the same for men.

Equality states that no one get special privileges, and that responsibilities and rights should be equally shared.

Either system is balanced and fair. The problem with modern Western culture is that many women want only the positives from both systems:

They want special privileges from the traditional system (men paying, being "gentlemen" by using special deferential manners and language to women, being the main breadwinner, etc) but not the old-fashioned obligations (being modest and ladylike, being a housewife, etc).

They want the positives of equality (rights, equal access to work and education, etc) without the responsibilities (paying your own way financially a full 50% for life, taking risks with no safety net, and taking your lumps without complaint like men do...not expecting to be protected or sheltered from harsh reality, etc).

You can't take only the good from both systems...you have to take the bad with the good in any balance you strike. When women try to have their cake and eat it in this way, the bad doesn't disappear...it gets paid by men, and this is why the current culture is one of exploitation by selfish hypocritical women...and it's why men are tired of the inequity.

If American women chose one system or the other and took their full share of the bad with the good there would be no problem. But current American culture discourages women being looked at critically, instead projecting all blame unjustly onto men; and so the inequity is rationalized away.

Crazy won't leave me alone

Goo goo dolls black balloon

The trouble with marriage

Marriage: the new blue-light case of the week. Everyone is terribly worried about its condition: can it be cured? Or, has the time arrived for drastic measures - just putting it out of its misery?

Euthanasia is a dirty word but, frankly, the prognosis is not so great for this particular patient, a stalwart social institution is now scabby and infirm, gasping for each tortured breath.

Many who had once so optimistically pledged to uphold its vows are fleeing its purported satisfactions.

In the US, a well-publicised 50 per cent failure rate hardly makes for optimism. Certainly there are happy marriages - no one disputes that - and all those who are happily married can stop reading here.

And there is always serial monogamy for those who can't face up to the bad news - yes, keep on trying until you get it right, because the problem couldn't be the institution itself or its impossible expectations.

For these optimists the problem is that they have somehow either failed to find the "right person" or have been remiss in some other respect.

If only they'd put those socks in the laundry basket instead of leaving them on the floor, everything would have worked out. If only they'd cooked more (or less) often. If only they'd been more this, less that, it would have been fine.

And what of the growing segment of the population to whom the term "happily married" does not precisely apply, yet who nonetheless valiantly struggle to uphold the tenets of the marital enterprise, mostly because there seems to be no viable option?

Rest of Article

Marriage?

All the older guys I know, guys that are 55 and older are telling me the same story; don't do it. It just turns to crap no matter what you do. They'd rather be independent. At best it's a tedious bore. At worst a living hell with financial ruin thrown in for good measure. The problem is that when you're young, you just naturally fall into this mind set where your whole self image is based on how women regard you, and so you spend all your money and energy trying to make yourself acceptable to them. Then later in life the shine wears off and you finally realize that you've wasted yourself on a bunch of crap.

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Andy Dufresne: I was in the path of the tornado... I just didn't expect the storm would last as long as it has.

Andy Dufresne: Get busy living, or get busy dying.

Andy Dufresne: [in letter to Red] Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.

Red: [narrating] I find I'm so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend, and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope.

Find old friends

Worrying about me again

OK. Am I too in touch with my feminine side if I really like this song?
Obviously I am a hopeless romantic, so it must be that all of YOU out there are the ones blowing it!!! :)

Snow Patrol: You're All I Have

Death

Our fear of death is like our fear that summer will be short, but when we have had our swing of pleasure, our fill of fruit, and our swelter of heat, we say we have had our day.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over. Yeah, I guess it is a friend.
- Jim Morrison

Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
- William Shakespeare

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