Little Old Lady

Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady:
I am 76 years old.
Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April
1st?
Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm
spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and
sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.
Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
It felt good! Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 20 years
ago.
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
He began to touch my breasts.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:
No, I certainly did not!
Defense Attorney:
Well, why not?
Little Old Lady:
His touching made me feel a ll alive and excited! I haven't felt
that good in years!!
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
Well, I was feeling so 'spic y' that I just laid down and told him
'Take me, young man! Take me now!'
Defense Attorney:
And did he "take" you?
Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fools!"
And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.......